📍 Quantico, Virginia – In a hall packed with decorated uniforms and tense faces, Pete Hegseth, Donald Trump’s new Secretary of Defense, dropped his bombshell:
👉 “Fat generals, out of the Pentagon.”
👉 “Beards banned.”
👉 “Twice-yearly weigh-ins for all personnel.”
The return of the Department of War came with no half measures. “The mission is one: fight wars, prepare for wars, and win wars,” thundered Hegseth in his 45-minute speech, with Trump nodding from the front row.
“No more walking on eggshells”
The new policy was branded with a reality-show style slogan: “no more walking on eggshells.” Goodbye sensitivity protocols, welcome back boots, shouting, and flying bunks.
Hegseth even invoked his 15-year-old son:
“I don’t want my son serving alongside out-of-shape troops or female comrades unable to meet the same combat standards.”
Trump drags Chicago onto the battlefield
The president added his own spark:
“Chicago should be a training battlefield for our troops. We are under invasion from within,” he said.
A Pentagon at war with itself
High-ranking officers, once untouchable, will now face twice-yearly weigh-ins. “If you don’t like it, resign with honor,” Hegseth declared.
But inside the Pentagon, sabers rattle: some warn the obsession with “fats and beards” may distract from China.
Trump summed it up with a grin:
“The army of excuses is over. Now we’ll have an army of warfighters.”
👉 If even the lovable Sergeant García would be kicked out of Trump’s army for being “fat and clumsy”… what will our unforgettable Zorro character do now?
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