Argentina
In Greater Buenos Aires, political campaigns are no longer debated in plazas, corner cafés, or even on gossip TV shows. Now they’re decided in the most democratic arena of all: the rubble dumpster.
President Javier Milei’s caravan was rolling through Lomas de Zamora amid applause and boos when suddenly—like a live reality show—stones, chunks of debris, and broken tiles (still labeled “Made in San Justo”) began to rain down. The President, his sister Karina, José Luis Espert, and Sebastián Pareja thus experienced a remixed version of “Shooting Stars,” but without Raphael and with far less glamour.
The SUV, hardly the Batmobile, had to speed away as if in “Fast & Furious: Libertarian Edition,” while the presidential guard tried to decide whether to shield the President or crawl under the seat. Witnesses claim some guards looked more interested in calculating the resale value of the rubble on Mercado Libre.
The libertarians denounced that the attack came from Peronist militants disguised as disgruntled construction workers. The other side swears it was pure coincidence: “The dumpster was right there, tempting, and well… sometimes you just can’t resist”.
The outcome: Milei unharmed, the SUV dented, and the neighborhood proudly boasting that it has invented the “Argentine school of political marketing, rubble included.”
In Junín they had already tried a rehearsal last week; in Lomas de Zamora they perfected the choreography. At this pace, the next campaign rally won’t need a stage but rather a reinforced concrete bunker with barbecue and catering for the guests.
And as if nothing were missing from this tragicomic script, a lawyer with a long memory and a sharp pen writes to us:
“It has been established that this is not a spontaneous phenomenon, but that the local municipality, headed by a Kirchnerist, and carried out by other well-known leaders of that organization, was involved.
Bearing in mind that terrorism is the systematic use of violence or the threat of violence, often through criminal acts, to intimidate a population and force governments or organizations to act or refrain from acting to achieve political, ideological, or religious objectives, the government could well obtain a judicial declaration that this faction of Peronism is, as everyone knows, a terrorist organization that continues the politics of the groups that covered the country in blood in the 1970s.
Such a declaration would mean that any person, by the mere fact of being part of organizations such as La Cámpora, Barrios de Pie, etc., could be considered a terrorist under legal terms and subjected to the penalties prescribed for that crime.
Likewise, those who promote or glorify these kinds of crimes.
In Italy, you had the Red Brigades. Here we had the ERP, the Montoneros, and their allies. And some of us old men, those in prison and those outside, do not forget that past which now returns.”
A conclusion that, between the satire of the “dumpster” and the tragic memory of the seventies, reminds us that the line between politics, violence, and justice in Argentina remains thin, slippery, and at times, bleeding.
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